I Dressed as a Drink for Money: Two Days in The world of Promo.

Oh no! Not Promo!

 In a previous blog I have talked about working for a TIE (Theatre in Education) company in Spain. Up until March of this year I was working for said company and the contract ended somewhat abruptly for both me and my Girlfriend. It was a horrible situation. We did not expect to be unemployed so fast. It felt like the rug had been pulled out from underneath us. I had plans for the money I was going to save, trips planned with my girlfriend. All of a sudden those plans were dramatically stripped away, burned to cinders, beaten to a bloody pulp and then pissed all over. But we picked ourselves back up and we're doing fine. I'm not even angry anymore, so you can get that idea right out of your head. 

Why am I telling you this? Because we all need to make ends meet. I am lucky enough to have a hospitality job I can go back to. I work with wonderful people, including my Mum, and I have an understanding boss who lets me swan around doing my actory stuff before I come back, kicking and screaming, all bloodied with my clothes torn. I found myself with a few days off, so I applied to be a mascot at a food and drinks fair. I've never been a mascot before, so I had no clue what it entailed. 

A famous, British rapper has released his own drinks brand, which happens to taste great, by the way. I've already been paid, I get nothing extra for saying that. The fair was at the Birmingham NEC. I highly recommend going. Free pizza, coffee, cake, free everything. I, and two other performers, donned giant replicas of said drinks. Huge outfits that made us look like affable, cute, approachable drinks cans. We went down a storm. Influencers wanted photos with us, I waved at James Cosmo of Game Of Thrones. He was promoting his new brand of drink. Busines owners approached us frequently to tell us how great a job we were doing. The one down side of this job was my back. It was knackered after the first day. Any skin character or mascot performer will know how hot these suits can get. I did not mind the heat so much. I had water stashed inside, cake, a smoothie. None of that matters when your back feels like it is falling out of your arse. 

James Cosmo.        

Advice for new mascot performers. 

Get as much detail on the venue, costume, location, everything, as you can. I knew there would be free food, but on my break I explored the wrong areas and I ended up buying a sandwich and a coffee from a posh coffee stand. Nine bastard pounds! I told my co workers and they RIGHTFULLY took pity on me. Suffice it to say, on my second day I ferreted away all the free food and drink that I could. I even ate plant based food. I didn't give a shit. 

You may be employed by people who do not know what being a mascot entails. They will not understand how hot it is, painful it can be, how thirsty you get. Don't stand around huffing and puffing, working yourself up in to a thirsty, hungry stooper. Tell them you need a break. I didn't do any of these things until day two. It was sooooo much better. If you don't tell people what you need, they will assume you are fine. I would like to clarify that were given regular breaks and a decent time for lunch, but those costumes beat the crap out of us.. 

Going back to costume; I did not know what exactly I would be wearing. You know why? Because I did not ask! Always ask. Will I be dressed up like a drinks can? If I wear my under suit on its own around the NEC, will it make me look naked and will I get funny looks from people? My undersuit was peach coloured to match the drink. Peach is perfect skin tone colour. I didn't have any extra clothes. The only choice I had when out of costume was to walk around in the peach coloured morph suit. I did look naked at first glance. I strutted and swaggered from stand to stand, looking for food and drink. I waved at people, shouted hello, gave the odd salute. I did all this knowing full well that the outline of my fellows, the boys, my business, was fully on show. My belly button was also peeping out. I did not feel the least bit embarrassed. I have done far more embarrassing things, and I will talk about them at some point. It gave people a good laugh, and ruined a few lunch breaks. 

Promo work, like this one, can be well paid. Just make sure you know what you are getting yourself in to. I would not be a mascot again, but I did have fun and I worked with two lovely performers so, swings and roundabouts.